Monday, February 11, 2013

Pretty Sure there is Poop on my Forehead I

This is will be an ongoing, Things Said, Thought, and Done, that I never thought I'd do, say, or think before I became a mom.

reheated my morning cocoa 4 times, I have yet to finish it.

I buy staples in bulk and keep them in 5 gallon buckets.  Today as I refilled the smaller containers from the buckets, DS2 decided to help.  He dumped about 10lbs of sugar into the wheat bucket.   Yes, I sifted it to use it, because it was the last of my wheat and unlike the Biblical parable of sifting the wheat from the tares, this story is about patience, not obedience.

Remember on Disney's The Jungle Book when Baloo (or was it Bagheera) grabbed Mowgli by his loin cloth and said "Hold on little Britches" yep, totally did that with a mostly naked toddler.

Prayed the Kindergarten bus would arrive after me.

Gave a black tabby cat a heart attack with my less than Nascar turning skills.

Pinky Promised a 6 year old I wouldn't tell his bus driver that he ate 2 conversation hearts while on the bus.

vacuumed snot from 4 nostrils.  (Yes, I have one, Yes, they are awesome, NO, they aren't legal to sell in the US, so if you want one, get it here)

typed this while nursing a baby

~Weebles may not fall down but they have the potential of breaking windows and blackening eyes.~

Selfishly devoured a fun size snickers I found on the floorboards of the van, while baby cried and toddler shouted "SOME!"

"Don't mutilate the cheese...and give me that knife, you are going to hurt someone."

Bread dough raised over the edge of the bowl and got icky-fied on my fridge shelf... as I carried the yucky hunk to the chicken scrap bucket the image of exploding chickens flashed through my mind and I opted to throw it away instead.  (raising dough in the fridge slows the process if you don't have time to bake it right away)

So Tell me!  Where have you found poop?  What have you said, thought, or done that you never expected to say, think, or do?  Share in the comments, no login or verification to annoy you.

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