Saturday, March 15, 2014

Getting Lucky

We married young and had kids right away, so by the time our friends were getting married we already had a baby crawling around our ghetto apartment.  These newlywed men would imply that since we were parents hubby isn't 'getting any'.  Apparently parenting takes up all your time and you never have any alone time, say What?  It seems that the more kids we had the less likely it is that we were having sex.  Clearly these people missed 9th grade health because you have to have sex to have babies.

It's true, having kids definitely makes alone time more of a rarity, but it isn't an impossibility, it just requires creativity!  (loving the -ity's tonight).  With a baby its not a challenge, they sleep like 16 hours a day, and by the time they stop taking multiple naps a day they have an attention span long enough to watch a cartoon.  Thank goodness for Dora, Diego, WonderPets!
With older kids and a nocturnal husband we have to be proactive in getting some alone time.  Hubby & I will tell the kids we need to 'plan the day' or 'talk' and we do talk or plan, for about 72 seconds. 

Today hubby and I happen to end up in the bedroom at the same time.

He looks at me, "Wanna make out?"
I shrug and wink.
He locks the door.
37 seconds after we start kissing there is a knock at the door.
Daddy!  You said you'd play Lego's.
silence as we smile at each other.  6 years ago this would have been enough to kill the mood for me.
DADDY!!! when are we playing Lego's?
Give me a few minutes to talk to your mom, then I'll be out.
*stomps down the hall*
resume kissing, hubby fumbles at my pants button.  (12 years and he still can't get them unhooked)
Thanks I say, I was feeling a bit fat in these pants after lunch.
light knocking on the door, a bit lower sounding, "blah lad dadaddad mamamamam!"
Baby love, go play with Sissy, I'll be out in a minute.
3 years ago this would have been enough to ruin the mood for me.
We hear his sister's greet him as he pads into their room.
Do you think the girls know what we are 'talking' about?
Does it matter?
Resume kissing.
I stop and pull away.  Did you disinfect your face after doing CPR on that dude?
I only did chest compressions.
Resume kissing
It's quiet.  Too quiet, and we know its too quiet, but we accept the consequences of our actions.  Any mess they make is worth it at this point.
What do I need to do to get you out of these pants? 
Grab the ankles and tug (like I said, skinny pants, I really do need help getting out of them)
He stands aside the bed, grabs the hems of my pants, and just before he pulls 
tumble.. crash ... and then crying.
This is still enough to kill the mood for me.   
His face tries to fall into a disappointed look, but he can't help but chuckle.
Maybe next time?
I love you.


  1. It's like we're living the same life, except I only have two. This is insanely accurate to "getting lucky" as parents, unless you wait until 2:21 am, when the house is completely asleep...

    1. our house its 10:21 am, because my hubby is home, the baby is napping, the toddler is watching some annoying show, and the older kids are at school. So if you call at that time and we don't answer, you know why!


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