Wednesday, November 19, 2014

FAQ's of a Cop's Wife

1. Your hubby is home on a weekday?
    Yep, he is home when all the kids are at school.  They haven't seen him in 4 days, he hasn't made it to a single ball game this season, or read a bedtime story in a week, but it's totally worth the sacrifice for me to have the opportunity to grocery shop without a toddler *insert sarcasm font*.

2. Your hubby has 4 day weekends?  That is so nice, hey, he could get a part time job!!
     Day 1: IF he gets home on time he'll sleep till the normal business day begins, then he wakes up and spends a few hours on the phone following up on cases with the District Attorney's office.  Then he tries to sleep for another hour or two until the kids get home from school, ecstatic to see daddy for the first time in over 48 hours.  Usually during that 2 hour nap another officer or lawyer will call to ask questions about a case or to remind him of a court case that they need to prep for.
    Day 2: He wakes up at o'dark thirty and heads to training for the day.
    Day 3: He wakes up at a normal time, squeezes in a work out, so he doesn't become a 'fat cop', then he'll do a couple chores around the house, and jump in the shower.  Before he is out of the shower he'll get a phone call, they have a rape victim on a bridge, can he come talk her off?
   Day 4:  His last day off.... his ONLY day off.
       Yep, another employer is totally gonna want to hire him!

3.  Aren't you worried he'll get shot?
      Yes, it terrifies me, but I can't dwell there.

4.  My brother's sister-in-law's cousin got a speeding ticket.  What should he do?
     Um.... stop speeding?

5.  My neighbor's dog won't stop barking?  What should I do?
     Um.... go talk to your neighbor like an adult?

6.  But Pot is totally harmless!  Why are cops wasting my tax dollars trying to keep it off the street?
     Because they don't like the smell.  or maybe its because....
     They see the side of Pot that you don't see.  It does cause problems.  If you'd like the details just ask, its far too extensive for this post.

7.  You are so lucky, you probably never get a ticket! (or other Quid Pro Quo reference)
      I haven't had a speeding ticket in 14 years... no way of knowing if that is because of 7 years of knowing every cop in town or the FACT that I just follow the law.  But in generalities, yes, there are cops that let their coworkers and friends off.  If it's a roll through a stop sign warning instead of a ticket that's called self preservation.  No one wants to piss off their friends.  Occasionally a cop will let someone off of a bigger crime DUII or a MIP, it happens, and these cops are less respected by their co-workers, because its just plain wrong, illegal, and unethical.

8. Why are all the cops in town hassling soccer moms for rolling through stop signs?
     Because they are just making contact with their town folk.  If in the process they see a toddler strapped incorrectly in their car seat they may offer advice.  If they find drugs then they get a statistic.

9.  Do cops have quotas?
   Not in our town.  Our agency is trained to correct behavior.  You get a lecture OR a ticket, whichever the officer feels will be more effective.  In other words, don't be a jackass and you are less likely to get a ticket. 

10. Cops are just Assholes and Criminals, nothing personal or anything, I'm not talking about your husband, he's a good one.
      And I am guessing that the loved ones of the cop to whom you are referring think their cop is a good one too.
     There are bad cops, no one denies that. But please base that judgement on their behavior over time, not in one instance of what is viewed as poor behavior but is more likely spill over stress from the previous call or past experience.  Every agency has a few jackasses, and everyone knows who they are.
 If you always judge a person based on their behavior at their lowest or most stressful point you will have very dreary view of life.  By those terms everyone is an Ass.  
Cops are rarely portrayed for the good they do.  My husband spent his morning on the phone with the ADA on a case he is working.  Earlier in the week he found an older homeless man, exposed to our harsh winter, while waiting on the lunch he'd ordered for the hungry man (on our dime), ran the mans name and was grateful to learn he had a warrant.  Thrilled he loaded this man in his warm car, drove him to a warm jail house where he was given and dry set of clothes, a dry bed, and a weekend full of warm hot meals.  This man was due in court and hubby reached out to the ADA to request a longer sentence for this man's probation violation.  A month or two instead of a weekend may very well save this man's life. 
The reason these events rarely make the news is because they are not unique events.  This stuff happens ALL. THE. TIME!
and yet Cops are still viewed as Assholes and Criminals.

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